Sure, John Corzine… you do seem like a real loser right now. As MF Global’s former CEO, misplacing 1.2 billion dollars and causing all those farmers to lose their life savings was pretty tacky. Being New Jersey’s disgraced ex-Gov doesn’t help either.
But cheer up! The future looks bright ahead — you can always run for President of the USA!
No, I’m not delusional. If you think no political party would nominate its most unsavory member to run for President, look no further than what Newt’s doing now among Republicans! All it takes is partisan pandering, and you’ve been good at that, too! After all, this is the land of opportunity. You’ll just have to wait until 2016, after Barack ends his second term.
You’re rotten, it’s true, but partisans seem to love that kind of person to run for President! If even someone like Newt can have so much success among Republicans despite all the baggage that he lugs around, surely you can get Democrats to nominate you, too!
Of course you’d lose the general election. Only Democrats would be so blind as to vote for somebody like you, just as only blinded Republicans will vote for Newt. But the fact that nominating Newt is sure to prove suicidal in a general election where most voters aren’t blind partisans hasn’t derailed his train that looks like it might be heading to the nomination. Pandering to blind partisans works!
And smart guys like you and Newt surely will find lots of ways to get even richer while leading your parties down in flames.
So, given your lack of decency, integrity, honor and scruples, there’s no reason not to go for it, Jon. With Newt as the pathfinder, unsavory character and horrendous baggage are finally enjoying their day in the sun.